The Strange World of Baby Modelling

I have mixed feelings about this new aspect of Eden's life, which Simon and I have introduced her to. Eden has been signed up by a modelling agency and has her first job on May 9th, a photo shoot for Mamas and Papas. I move between feeling excited about this and then oddly depressed and fearful. I think it gives me a chance to examine my fears and work out how realistic they are and how to deal with them. My worst fears are that she gets loads of work and I end up feeling that Eden has more of a career than I do! It is time-consuming going to castings and fittings and that's before the job has even started. Also I worry that she will come to think that being pretty is more valuable and praise-worthy than anything else (the photographers and assorted staff around constantly encourage her with 'ooh, aren't you pretty' etc). I worry that she will begin to think she is in some way better than babies that don't do modelling, that other children will be jealous of her later on. And so it goes. Weird fears that have grown out of all proportion to what is actually happening. Oh, and I also worry about why I ever wanted her to become involved in the first place. What must that say about me? To address my own fears I only need to take a big deep breath and remember that: 1. Simon and I can choose to stop whenever we feel like it 2. Eden's modelling is a tiny tiny part of her life and she is not going to become a spoilt terrible child overnight. I must have confidence that our parenting has an effect well beyond a few days a year being told how pretty she is. 3.Remember the positives. These are that we thought it would be great for her to see her photo in catalogues when she is older. She earns some money that she will be able to spend when she is older (this allows us to help her to budget at a later date). She gets experience mixing with new people. Simon and I get to have a change to the usual baby day routine. 4. Eden has no concept of modelling at the moment. She has no idea of the meaning of what is happening, She just gets to wear different clothes, sit down and have someone point a black thing at her while people around her coo and wave floppy rabbits around. Not a bad day for her really. 5. Baby modelling is less problematic for me than child modelling, when the child has an awareness of rejection and I am not sure whether I want that for Eden. Really, as yet we do not know what Eden is going to want so we can give her opportunities and wait until she gets older to see what happens next. 6. She might never get another job anyway! To compound my ambivalence, the BBC have been following some babies around to document their first experiences of baby modelling and Eden is one of those babies. Simon and I have been interviewed at castings and fittings about how we feel about what's going on and I seem to be asked questions that had never occured to me before and end up seeming slightly vacant! The interviewer is very nice but likes to ask very open-ended questions without any follow-up questions so it's left to you to stand there and dig your own grave. What do I keep telling clients? You cannot worry about what other people think of you because their opinions are not important. Relying on other's judgements for your own self-esteem dooms you to insecurity and anxiety. Only what I think is valuable. I will hold onto those thoughts. What to do with fear? Examine it and answer it back. My fears tell me that perhaps I am worried that I will come to value Eden for being pretty, although as I write this, I know that that will not happen. My fears are as much about me as about her. I worry about being the sort of Mum who has nothing in her life except taking her child to anotehr model casting. This also is not going to happen because I value and love my coaching work with a passion.Trust my instincts, be confident about the person that Eden is going to become and relax into what can be a fun experience that Eden can groan and laugh about in years to come.